Whenever I get a chance, I
try to find something to read about leadership.
Might be an article. Might be a
blog. Might be a book. One of the articles I read recently
challenged me to think about what inspires me.
That is, what brings out the best in me.
And whenever I think about
inspiration, I always end up thinking about people who are inspiring. You know, those people we look up to. Role models.
People who, in our eyes, have done great things and give us the
motivation to do great things ourselves.
My sources of inspiration have
changed over time. Like a lot of little
kids, I progressed from superheroes – Superman, Batman, Spiderman - to sports
heroes – Hank Aaron, Mike Schmidt,
Julius Erving, Walt Frazier, Bobby Clarke, Harold Carmichael. I even dabbled in music and movie heroes –
the Beatles, Eric Clapton, Elton John, Al Pacino, Robert Redford, Sean
Connery. I got a little more serious
about my inspiration when I looked to Bobby Kennedy and Martin Luther King Jr.
for that inspiration.
What I didn’t realize was
that while I was busy looking outside my home for my inspiration, the greatest inspiration
in my world was living with me every day.
I’m proud to say that although it took me some time to figure it out, it
was my dad who has truly been my greatest inspiration. People wouldn’t consider my father an
extraordinary man. He didn’t fight in a
war. He didn’t cure a disease. He never wrote a book. He didn’t accumulate great wealth. He didn’t lead a nation. All this immigrant from Ireland did was
finish his education, work – without missing a day – for nearly 50 years (35
with the same company), stay married to the same woman until she died 40 years
later, was home every night to help raise three sons, visited his mother at
least once per week and made sure my brothers and I had plenty of
responsibilities, understood right from wrong, and understood that choosing
right was the only option.
It’s a cliché I know but my
dad was there in the good times and the bad.
There was a lot of laughter in our house. There were also a lot of tears. Besides the challenges my brothers and I
provided, my dad was faced with watching my mom struggle through physical
illness and multiple surgeries throughout her life. So often he was as much a caretaker as he was
a husband. His challenges were greatest
though when I was a junior in high school.
That was the year my mom attempted suicide. She spent considerable time in what we called
then a mental institution, trying to deal with clinical depression. We were all thankful that she eventually
recovered. Through it all, my dad stayed
by her side, stayed connected to us and most importantly – stayed. I don’t know what my brothers and I would
have done if he would have decided that it was just too hard and left. My mom passed away 19 years ago. My dad remarried 4 years later. His second wife had two granddaughter who was
neglected and abused. And because he
couldn’t stand the thought of such horror for a child, at the age of 70, my dad
adopted and helped raise a 14 year old girl.
He just kept doing what he always did – sacrifice for others.
I thought the world of my dad
when I was a little guy. In high school
I came to believe I was much smarter than he was and all of a sudden I was
making mistakes, learning lessons the hard way.
By the time I had my own sons, my dad got smarter again. Just in time because quite frankly, if I had to
go through this being a father stuff alone, I don’t know what I’d do.
From the time I left Philly
and came to Iowa to go to college, I talked to my dad every Sunday and often
during the week. Sometimes we had a lot
to share, sometimes not so much. But I’m
grateful for every one of those conversations.
The last conversation I had
with him was during Holy Week of 2012.
He died on Good Friday. He was
77. Although he certainly didn’t take
away the sins of the world, it seemed appropriate to me that God chose Good
Friday to bring home a man who had sacrificed so much for his family and
others.
My dad is gone but his
inspiration lives inside of me. The
model he was for how to live a life is something that will never die. I can only hope to be the half the man he
was.
So how does this play out for
you. I guess all I’m saying is that when
you’re looking for inspiration, look to two places. Look to the Cross where you will find the
ultimate inspiration. And look inside
your own home. If you really pay
attention, the inspiration may overwhelm you.
